Eczema, I Hate You

Eczema is red, dry, itchy patches and is often the result of an allergy, whether it be food or topical irritants (perfumes, dyes, and chemicals in common household products like soaps, laundry detergents, fabric softeners, and bubble baths). It can also flare up due to being overheated, so light layers are extremely important.


My battle with eczema began around the 3 month mark. It started off on his thighs, but I was able to get rid of it by using Tyrus' diaper rash balm because it contains Calendula. I was told by my public health nurse that eczema is common with babies and that anything containing calendula will heal it. It was never explained to me what eczema is and why it can occur. I never thought to google it, but wish that I had so I could have gotten it under control much sooner.

Anyways, the eczema flared back up within days. He had a patch on his belly, one on his right arm, all over his right cheek, and forehead. Both of his calves were covered, as well. I asked a local mom group for tips, but they were all telling me things that I can put on his skin. So, I tried it. I tried coconut oil, baby oil, olive oil, Penaten cream, you name it and I probably tried it. Everything made it worse, so bad that he ended up developing a terrible case of cradle cap, as well.  My poor baby was so uncomfortable and itchy and there wasn't anything that I could do for him. I was feeling absolutely helpless. So, I posted on the mom group again explaining the situation and that I'd tried everyone's recommendation. This time I included a photo of what his face/head looked like and that's when people realized just how serious his case of eczema and cradle cap really were.  A friend of mine, that also belongs to the group, messaged me and said that I should try breast milk for the cradle cap (I wrote a blog about that here). Thankfully it was a success, so now I only have the eczema to deal with.

Day 3 of strict diet

After talking to a nutritionist, it became quite clear that Tyrus is allergic to something that I'm eating. I've had to cut sugar, gluten, dairy, wheat, and fermented foods from my diet and it's helping! The eczema started to clear up within a three days of being on the diet and we were both SO relieved. However, it's a very hard diet for me to stick to. I was exclusively breast feeding, so it was important that I eat lots, but I was struggling to get enough food/calories into my body and my milk supply was beginning to suffer. Breast feeding is the absolute most important part of motherhood, for me, so I refuse to give it up. I have my good days and my bad days with the diet and his skin has definitely suffered, but it's healing slowly. I've been trying to pin-point the exact foods causing a reaction, but it's so hard. I know for sure that ice cream, milk, and peanut butter cause flare ups, but that's it so far. 



The best remedy that I've come across is La Roche-Posay Lipikar Baume. It can be found at Shoppers in the dermatology section. Yes, it's a little pricey, but it's so worth it! I apply it immediately after a bath, while he's still damp. I also apply it numerous times throughout the day. I threw out the baby Vaseline and Aveeno Baby Eczema care after starting the Lipikar Baume, it's far better and not full of crazy chemicals. I also make my own laundry detergent that consists of borax, washing soda, and dove sensitive skin soap. In addition, my son's chiropractor recently told me to start giving him a probiotic. We tried Bio-K, but it tasted and smelled AWFUL! So, we decided to start Flora Super Toddler Probiotic, it's a powder that I mix into his food. It has honestly been the best cure. I stopped using all of the lotions and crap after starting a probiotic. We still lotion up when his skin gets dry, though.

The most important thing to understand about eczema is that you need to heal it from the inside out, so my diet change and the probiotic is going to prevent it from reoccurring. This has been a brutal, long battle for us and it can be very tiring. I'm sick of people making nasty comments and giving me "helpful" advice of what worked for their "not as bad" case of eczema, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel... somewhere. Hopefully I can help a few momma's out with this post. If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me! 

3 weeks after initial post :)

8.5 months after initial post :) 

Five Months Old

Currently: 
15lbs 13oz
25.5 inches
Growing super blonde hair and still have blue eyes!

Likes: 
Taking naps, finally
Playing in the exersaucer, particularly screaming at his toys.
Stroller rides
Bath time
Sand at the beach

Dislikes: 
Drinking water, but he does it anyways
Extra long car rides
Feet in the ocean
Eating solids

Sleep: 
What is sleep? I put you down between 10:30pm and 11:00pm and you're good for waking up every 2  hours for a feeding, sometimes I get 3 hours of solid sleep.

Best Moments: 
Meeting his aunty Caitlin and Grandma Fran
First Easter
Learning to crawl and almost sitting up on his own
Discovering bunnies on his blanket
Laughing ALL of the time
Trying sweet potato

Worst Moments:
4 month sleep regression

Stiiiiill battling eczema

Currently allergic to dairy, mostly milk, and peanuts

Favourite Pictures:

Sleep Regression Sucks

I remember hearing about this whole "sleep regression" thing and thought that it was just bullshit. To me, it sounded like a huge growth spurt that resulted in frequent feedings and cuddles. Whatever, been there done that! All babies go through growth spurts and I've survived them just fine, so far. Boy, was I wrong... sleep regression SUCKS!

First off, I was quite wrong about what a sleep regression entails. Babies go through this five times by the time they're two years old, all for different reasons. At four months old, my babe is going through a change in his sleep cycle that will match that of an adult. Rumour has it this regression only lasts for two-three weeks, but can continue for upward of six weeks!

So, how am I dealing with this? Well, the last two weeks I was in complete denial. However, I've slowly began to say goodbye to the times when baby T would fall asleep practically anywhere and for long periods of time. I'm realizing that the way we sleep and cuddle is changing and it won't ever be the same again. It's bitter sweet, but it's just another milestone to accomplish with my little baby.

Onward and upward, it's time to come up with a game plan because his sleep regression doesn't seem to be ending any time soon. Currently, I'm a walking, talking, barely functioning (but still hitting the gym), tired momma. Baby T has been waking me up every hour, but sometimes he'll give me an extra 30 minutes. Is he hungry? Nope! Is he wanting to play? Definitely not. He's transitioning from one sleep cycle into the next, but instead of waking up briefly and going back to sleep (like adults), he wakes up and fusses until I pick him up and give him some boobie milk. He isn't used to this new form of sleep, so I have to help him fall back into a new cycle.

What I've learned is that my babe doesn't fall into a deep cycle of sleep right away, like he used to, so I have to nurse and rock him to sleep and then wait a good 30 minutes before putting him down. This allows him to enter a deep cycle of sleep without disruption. If I were to put him down too soon, then he would wake up and I'd have to start all over again. A child's sleep cycle lasts from 30-45 minutes, after that a child will lightly wake up and then fall back into another sleep cycle. Now, for our precious little babies, their sleep cycles last from 45-50 minutes... sound familiar? If you remember what I had stated above, Tyrus was waking me up every hour, sometimes every 90 minutes. What I was uneducated on is why he was waking me up, he was transitioning into another sleep cycle but unsure of the feeling, so he needed to be cuddled/nursed back to sleep. Make sense now? This knowledge has helped me to not be so frustrated during this time in our lives, but it sure doesn't take away the tiredness.

Now, it normally takes me a few days to write a blog, depending on what's going on in my life and how baby T is. I started this post on Monday April 13th but it's now Thursday April 17th and I'm happy to report that Tyrus FINALLY slept through the night. The definition of "slept through the night" is a little misleading, though. Five hours of continuous sleep is considered sleeping through the night... not the 12 hours that I would have loved, but I'll take it. Tyrus slept a full five hours and then was up every hour after that. I've never felt so refreshed in my life! Who knows, though... it might just be a fluke.

In the end, this is all the advice that I can offer... be patient. This time in your life is very short, although it may not feel that way right now. You want to cherish these little memories and soak in your tiny baby before s/he no longer wants to cuddle. Also, remember to make time for yourself. Even if you take 20 minutes to relax in the tub, do it! Ask your partner or a family member to watch baby, they'll be fine. You deserve some lovin', too! De-stress, relax, and remember that it's okay to cry.

Boob Job? Sign Me Up!

My boobs used to be the perfect size... until I lost a bunch of weight. I went from being a voluptuous 36 C down to a 32 B and that was the start of the love/hate relationship I have with my boobs. I began to notice how weirdly shaped they were, mostly because of the loose skin, so I went on a mission to find the perfect bra. My boyfriend at the time would constantly tell me that I was being ridiculous and that my boobs were "fine", but I wasn't convinced. That's when I discovered the wonderful DOUBLE push-up bra! This bra did wonders for my sad, pathetic looking boobs and I vowed to never buy a normal bra again. I stuck true to that vow for a few years. I ended up owning seven double push-up bras and two double push-up bikinis... thank you, Victoria's Secret!

However, my relationship with my boobs took a huge detour when I found out that I was pregnant. This was the start of a whole new experience for me. My boobs started growing early on, but not too quickly. I ended up going from my 32 D double push-up bras to 34 D push-up, so not a huge leap, but I still felt self-concious. Honestly, I bought only push-up bras while I was pregnant. I had tried on a few regular bras, but I didn't like how my boobs looked in them. Now, as I write this, I realize how silly that sounds. I'm proud to say that I no longer wear my push-up bras, mostly because they can get super uncomfortable when my boobs are full of milk, but I also don't need them right now. For now.

There is a fear that I've developed... what are my boobs going to look like when I'm done breast feeding? Are they going to be worse than before? Will they go back down to 32B? Will I start buying double push-up bras again? Needless to say, I'm not looking forward to the day I stop producing milk. All of these questions could easily evaporate with one simple, common procedure... a boob job.

This is something that I had considered in the past, even got a few surgeon names, but choked on the fact that it would cost me $100 just to have a consultation with the "best of the best" in my city. I quickly gave up on that dream and continued on with my double push-up bras, but things have changed. Breastfeeding has already taken a toll on my already loose skinned boobs and I'm only four months in. I plan on breast feeding for quite awhile longer, so I can only imagine how much worse they could get in that time.

So, where is a single momma of one going to come up with $7,000-$8,000 dollars? I considered saving a little every month, but realized how selfish that was. The money that I was going to put aside is now being put into an RESP for my baby, but I'm not going to let go of my new dream of a beautiful set of fake boobies just yet!

My new goal is to go back to school, graduate, get a well paying job, and then save some extra, extra cash aside for my new boobs. I even considered taking the "new tits" jar idea from the movie Bad Teacher... too much? Maybe.

It's important to love your post-partum body, something I'm still learning to do on a daily basis, but I don't see the harm in getting a boob job. It's something I've wanted in the past and if I can afford it somewhere down the line, then why not? I deserve to feel sexy again!
                                                          

"...you're pregnant"

My life changed drastically one year ago. I had a routine visit to the doctors office to get some medical forms signed, but I had a feeling that I should also take a pregnancy test. I almost didn't ask, my doctor was about to walk out of the room, but then I blurted out "can I take a pregnancy test?" She gave me this look only a momma would give and asked quietly "is there a change you're pregnant?" I just nodded and she walked out of the room for a few seconds. She returned with a little plastic cup and directed me to the washroom.

I sat in the room, impatiently waiting for her to return. I envisioned her coming back in and saying "it's negative..." over and over again, hoping it would change the inevitable result. My doctor finally returned and told me the words I already knew "it's positive... you're pregnant."

Tears ensued. Tears of fear. Tears of anger. Tears filled with anxiety. I couldn't have this baby, not with the baby daddy, and not yet in life. I wasn't ready. He would leave. I can't do this. I can't be a single mom. We talked about my options and then she sent me on my way, asking for my return in one week with a decision.

On my way to meet up with my mom I found a shiny loonie on the ground, so I picked it up. Was this a sign? It was possible, but I had already made up my mind that I wasn't keeping this pregnancy. I even told my mom that I wanted to go for an abortion... but then I had a conversation with a friend of mine that was 7 months pregnant. She knew everything about me because she also did my nails, so I bitched a lot to her about all of the crap going on in my life. We talked for several hours about everything and at the end of the conversation, I turned to my mom, with tears in my eyes, and whispered "I think I want to keep it..."

12 weeks 1 day

12 weeks 5 days

                               

Oh, and that shiny loonie? It's still in my wallet, with me where ever I go.